nice will be nice.

(get it?)

I have officially been backpacking for 2 months now and I am officially tired. I want an air conditioner. I want a warm and healthy meal (with no cheese or bread). And I want something consistent for more than 3 days. So in Nice... I had an air conditioner.

This was not my first time to Nice- I had a train incident/ layover/ French rail strikes too much experience here on my way back to Italy from Barcelona. I was told to ask for "the pink lady". And she, obviously, was a lady covered from head to toe in pink. Unfortunately, not all of her clothing was thick enough or big enough to cover her one million year old body. Needless to say- I had my doubts about Nice.

This time I ducked out early enough the next morning to avoid having to tell my story to someone- again. ("where ya from?" "how long ya traveling?" "where ya been/ going?") And I started walking. I hit the market in vieux nice, the old town.

This picture is to torture Jamie and Dan:


I have never seen so many olives in my life. It was gross. I mean delicious?

I also had to hold my breath when walking past the seafood section. I don't know who thought it was a good idea to put raw fish outside.. In the sun! But that shit don't seem kosher to me. And here- the stinkiest spot in France, I had a 'Romeo & Juliet' moment:
A group of about 4 French waiters flagged me down in the market to give me a rose. I didn't take it though because I thought that I would then have to buy a steak or something. But when 3 of them started picking the thorns off, I began to believe that they were not actually gypsies in disguise- so I took it with a smile. But not that graceful of a smile because I was plugging my nose and trying not to vom all over the hot and raw fish.

This day was also Bastille Day- the French version of Independence Day. I gave in and socialized in 'the champagne room'. (don't sing the song "no sex in the champagne room to people who are not American. They won't get it.) Conversation changed to the "wicked" fireworks show that will be happening later that night on the beach. Cool. Rad. Not. Weakest fireworks show I've ever seen. And the crowds around were going "oohhhhhhh!!!! aahhhhhhh!!!" when this little sucker went off.

The next day was spent on the beach in Monaco. This place smells like money. Yachts for days. And a Bentley next to a Rolls Royce next to a gold brick.


I know this may be difficult to believe people- but I have a tan. A legit tan. Not to be confused with a bunch of freckles blending together. A tan. An Australian (aka the tannest people ever) even told me I was tan. Granted, he was probably humoring me- but it worked.

The other thing I will always remember about this day is that it is the day that mama drew the line. She's coming to Spain in September and she will not be leaving empty handed. So it looks like this young lady will be returning to the heart of Texas come September 10.

And the next morning I left for the biggest disappointment of my whole euro-trip: Milan. Someone described Milan as "boring as bat shit". Well I saw 'Ace Ventura Pet Detective' and I know about bat poo! And that is even cooler than Milan! So I paid too much to sit by a pool all day and sweat. Because Italy hates the ac. And ice.

(but i did find this cool ray ban sign and took a picture with my ray bans on.)


And somewhere in the heat stroke that was these previous days- I lost my cup... and my pajamas.