LORD, HAVE MERCY!!!

i wanted to "go with the flow", and i didn´t get a chance to get out of houston before i got some pretty shitty flows.

first big sacrifice: get it right, people. i left my CHI (hair straightener) at home. on purpose. what am i thinking!?

my relaxing morning jog turned into a rageing vomfest. and only after 27 min. at 8am. i can run 13.1 miles (three times!) but 27 min. in houston and i´m donezo. i´ll blame that one on the nerves.

delayed flight from houston to philly. expected time of arrival: aprox 3 min. before my connection to lisbon.

baby jesus? if i promise to keep flowing will you help me catch my flight?

and i did!

and then i saw a woman who was not flowing. on the plane to portugal, she is standing so we can all see her (and hear her) "i will not get off this plane. i AM going to lisbon TONIGHT!" f bombs are dropped left and right. people are offering her different seats, as she repplies "no way baby! i need room for my legs to streeaaaaach!!" and the whole time all i can think is, "whyyyyyy did i leave my CHI at home?!"

1/2 an ambien later, welcome to portugal! (30 min. late due to volcanic ash. i´ll blame that one on the volcanic bitch.)

some guy: where are you from?
me: the states.
guy: which one?
me: the best one.
guy: texas??
me: WOOO!!!!!!